The Dark Knight Rises, The Brown Comedian Falls...Asleep

It had been a long week for me. With my day job and comedy, my sleeping patterns have always been suspect. But, nothing was going to stop me from seeing The Dark Knight Rises this weekend. My buddy from Cleveland was coming into town, so a group of us made a plan to watch the 10:40 PM showing on Friday night.

Since I don't see these friends as often, we went all out at happy hour. There were beverages and half-price appetizers galore. I was filled up to a disgusting level for the movie. There would be no need for me to feel hungry during the show.

However, knowing full well  I hadn't gotten a great night of sleep throughout the week and now I had plenty of food in me, the possibility of me dozing off was high. I also had a history of this type of thing occurring. On a similar night, I fell asleep during a 10 PM showing of The Expendables. I briefly dozed off during an afternoon show of The Avengers (by the way, 3-D glasses really help cover up the embarrassment of taking a nap during a movie you paid a lot of money to see). Simply put, a food coma and a dark movie theater do not mix well for me.

Well aware of my track record, I decided that, given the circumstances, I needed a 5-Hour Energy. I took down the 5-Hour Energy. As I would soon find out, 5-Hour Energy has no effect on my body in this circumstance.

We arrived at 10:10 to find the line leading into the theater where the 10:40 showing was going on was quite long. While we may have bought advanced tickets, we did not buy advanced line placement. We managed to get seats together in the third row. As a result, I knew this might not go well. I have a ton of food and drink in my system, and now I have to crane my neck to look at a giant IMAX screen for three hours? This is going to get uncomfortable.

I fell asleep during the previews. I don't know a single trailer that happened nor any other advertisements. However, it was perfect timing. As the movie began, I woke up and was alert. I thought to myself that I got the nap that I needed out of the way and that I could make it through the long haul of the movie.

It was going well for a while. I was enjoying the movie and was focused on it, but then it started to turn. At some point, Catwoman was talking, and I dozed off, and had a dream that involved eating tater tots (one of the appetizers that I did eat earlier in the night). So, essentially, portions of The Dark Knight Rises became Inception for me.

I don't know how long I was asleep for, but I woke up in time for the major portion of the film and the parts that counted that led to the ending.

I left the theater with a bit of neck pain and a complete desire to go directly to bed. I also think I have to put a ban on myself of not seeing any movie after 10 PM. I just cannot be trusted to be alert.

Also, as a result, I'm going to have to watch The Dark Knight Rises again. I'll likely do a matinee a month from now. I'll also be making sure the matinee is not after a major meal. 

                     I fell asleep at a Halloween party at 9:30 PM. I'm awesome.