We're coming up on my one-month anniversary on Twitter. It's been fun so far. I like writing random jokes. That's the point, right? I'm not really sure what regular people do on the site. They probably treat it like Facebook, and post pictures of their meals.
One of the bigger issues that I've found is what trends on Twitter. Twitter is clearly run by teenagers, people who love sports (seriously, Bobby Abreu is trending?), and the generally insane of the world. Since teenagers take up part of Twitter, there is almost a constant trend related to Justin Bieber, a young man who I've deduced to be God.
There have been multiple trends revolving around Selena such as #selenadeservesrespect or #weloveselena or #selenalikessandwiches. It always takes me a few seconds to realize that the trend is talking about Selena Gomez. Maybe it's because I'm an old fogey totally detached from our youth, but when I see the name Selena, I think Selena.
When I worked at the Mexican art store with Dolph Ziggler, we'd have Selena bumping through the stereo. It was pretty awesome. If you were a kid of the 90s and at all in tune with pop culture, you couldn't have avoided at least knowing the sad end to Selena's life and her impact to the Latin community if you didn't already know her music, particularly after the release of the movie about her life starring Jennifer Lopez.
So, whenever I see that Selena is trending, I will think warmly of the true Selena. You can take the man out of the Mexican art store, but you can't take the Mexican art store out of the man. Here's my favorite Selena song:
Sumukh and Golak talk the Crew (and their home opener), soccer, Hooliganism, Pittsburgh sports, accidental drunkenness, Ohio State basketball, Tiger Woods, The Masters, and a bet between Sumukh and Golak.
New episode every Tuesday.
Sumukh and Golak are back and they introduce their first call-in guest, Nirish Doshi. With Dosh, Sumukh and Golak talk brackets (and if they're in the trash can yet), upsets, fandom, gambling, five dollars, Ohio college basketball, NFL free agency, NBA/porn, Sumukh's diet, ribs (and jazz), and, hopefully, future questions from our listeners.
I listened to the most recent episode of This American Life entitled “Retraction.” “Retraction” has drawn a lot of attention because the initial episode that appeared on the show, “Mr. Daisey Goes to the Apple Factory,” proved to have a number of misleading and fabricated parts in its story.
If you haven't read about the matter or the viewpoints about the story, there are plenty of sites, writers, and bloggers on the Internet who are discussing Mike Daisey, journalistic integrity, and the treatment of workers in Apple factories. That is not what my blog post will focus in on. I'd rather look to raise questions about some of the views that Daisey and host Ira Glass brought up about the theater and how that relates to stand-up comedy, joke writing, and performance.
In the episode, Daisey sits down with Glass to discuss the facts that were at issue in his original monologue. The interview is awkward with, at times, long pauses where Daisey contemplates what to say. Ultimately, he is only apologetic that he presented the piece on a show like This American Life when he believes it to be more theater than it is journalism.
At one point, Daisey remarks, “I believe that when I perform it in a theatrical context in the theater that when people hear the story in those terms we have different languages for what the truth means.”
Glass, as an observer of theater does not agree with this perspective, and later states, “I know but I feel like I have the normal worldview. The normal worldview is somebody stands on stage and says 'this happened to me.' I think it happened to them, unless it's clearly labeled as 'here's a work of fiction.'
Based off both Daisey's remark as a performer and Glass's remark as a viewer, I can see both sides of it as a stand-up comedian, though I lean towards Glass's perspective. I think what led to this circumstance being such an issue is that it was presented on what is normally a radio program that is a beacon of journalistic integrity, and that the serious issue of worker's rights should not be toyed with factually. However, in what these two men say for the sake of performance and facts in general, it sparks many more questions.
My act now involves more storytelling than it ever has before. I take personal stories that have happened to me in my life and turn them into jokes. Are those stories fake? Not at all. Have I changed things in the truth of the story because it is best for the timing and telling of the joke? Yes, but not that it dramatically changes how the story actually happened. Do I know of other comedians who have done that as well? Definitely.
I've spoken to comedians about some of their jokes that they have told over time. I've heard everything from them from “That never actually happened” (something I don't understand and something presumably Glass would not appreciate as well) to “It was actually this person who said that to me and not that person” to “I combined two different stories into one.” Different adjustments arise in order to make a personal story even funnier in terms of joke construction. So, essentially, we understand on a foundational level what Daisey is saying. It is a performance, and as such, I have to do what's best for the performance.
On the flip side, Glass says that when a performer says 'this happened to me,' it is expected to be the truth. That is true, but the main question at hand is what is the extent to that truth? Does every word have to be accurate? Just every situation? Obviously, we also have to look at the magnitude of the story. There's a major difference between what exactly my mother said to me when pouring another pile of Indian food on to my plate as opposed to whether a worker revealed to Daisey that she was 13 years old and working at a factory. Additionally, there may be a difference between a serious monologue and stand-up comedy. Does an audience do as Glass says and expect the truth at a serious show like that but in the world of stand-up comedy does not expect the truth even if it is presented to them as a 'this happened to me joke'?
In 2010, I enjoyed my drive up to Christmas with my family by listening to This American Life's “Comedians of Christmas” comedy special. It was a hilarious and touching mix of stories from several great comedians that are regular contributors to the show. But, imagine if one of these stories was not true. What if there were fabrications within these supposedly truthful stories? Does This American Life retract this episode? Why is truth expected in one case but not in another case? Is it just because of how lighthearted the story is comparatively? Is it because this is expected as performance and not as fact? Is it because it is truly more personal and does not involve a much bigger political issue?
I'm not sure that I have a definitive point in this blog post other than the fact that the Mike Daisey situation brings up a lot of questions even about authenticity and performance within stand-up comedy and how our audiences view us. On a personal level, I do my best to represent myself as I want to be represented and to provide truthful, funny material. But, certainly, I've made edits to actual stories to ensure that the performance is better and funnier.
In the end, I think Mike Daisey for whatever reason wants to believe that he can have a stand-up comedian type of perspective on a performance, but he cannot when there's a bigger issue at hand that he is tackling. That's when you grab the expectations of the audience. They are caught up in the importance and reality of your subject matter. For stand-up comedians, perhaps it's easier. The audience arrives with an expectation that there may be fiction in this world. The subject matters are normally much more absurd and less serious.
The main question to ask is, regardless of subject matter, if a performance on any stage is personal, how much does the audience expect for it to be the truth and how much honesty should the performer be giving? I think the perspectives of both Mike Daisey and Ira Glass have exposed us to that question not having a clear answer.
It's summer! Well, not really. It's not even really spring yet. But just to let you all know, I love summer so much that I usually just call spring/summer, summer, and I usually start calling it summer the first day it hits in the mid-60's. I really wanted to post this a couple weeks ago, but a summer post in February seemed like a stretch even for a summer-lover like myself.
Now that the temps have hit the 70s, you probably won't be able to walk into any bar around the city without hearing "Summertime" by Will Smith. And you will probably be hearing it for the next 3 months or so ad nauseam. And that's ok-ish. I like that song. And it does get me excited for summer. But, come on, we can do better. The genre of Hip Hop offers a plethora of music, so much of it catered to that good-time, summer feeling, that we don't need to constantly default to Will Smith's pre-Jiggy offerings. Below are some of the Hip Hop songs I turn to when the weather gets warmer.
Nuthin' But A "G" Thang - Dr. Dre
No shame in starting off a list with an obvious pick. Really, when it comes to summer music, in most cases you need look no further than the west coast style pioneered by Dr. Dre in the 90's. "G" Thang just happens to be my favorite of the lot. But really, any track off "The Chronic" (or any track off the album of any artist off the Dr. Dre production tree) can fit in with your summer festivities. It's kind of like pairing wine with food. Put on "Let Me Ride" to relax the mood by the pool, and when dusk hits, and the party moves back to your apartment, put on the above track.
Also, I should note, as a child of the 90's, I grew up with music videos. Songs like these, which great are great audio accompaniments to any summer event, are really kicked up by videos that also showcase warm weather fun. A great example of this is also Coolio's "Fantastic Voyage."
Naughty By Nature - Feel Me Flow
If I didn't love this song so much, I probably could have just linked to it in the above chunk since it shares a lot of the same qualities mentioned above. Great warm weather video. West coast style beat. But, I just love the shit out of this song and it's almost always the first to get played when the temp starts rising.
Ice Cube - It Was A Good Day
I still consider this a summer song even though someone recently determined that Ice Cube's Good Day was January 20th. No one is having a good day in mid-January. This is a summer jam if there ever was one. Because that's the best part about summer, any day can be a good day. Great weather opens so many activity options and a simple work call-off can leave you open to a day full of adventure. What would I do on my good day? Well, you can find out HERE. I hope everyone's summer is filled with beeps (I guest texts now) from Kim.
2Pac - California Love
So dusk comes and the pool party turns into an impromptu house party at your pad as mentioned above. If this song doesn't come on at that party, your party probably wasn't that good. It's like a party skeleton key. It improves any playlist, brings any non-dancer onto the dance floor and gives them instant rhythm (mostly because the dance floor is so packed no one can notice their glaring lack of skill), and blends everybody in the room from early 20's to mid-30's (if someone at your party doesn't recognize this song kick them out...either your Dad is over killing your vibe or you're about to be charged with statutory rapy you perv) into a vibe of musical appreciation and nostalgia.
And before we move on to some different things, shout out to The Game for continuing some of the past greatness of the west coast to the present with a personal summer time favorite of mine, "Ol' English."
Notorious B.I.G. - Big Poppa
With all the west coast love this list has been showing, it'd be inappropriate not to show off some of the summer flavor that the east coast has to offer.
Bone Thugs-N-Harmony - 1st Of Tha Month
Did you call off work too many times to enjoy the sunshine? Well, then you might be able to relate to this welfare anthem by Cleveland natives Bone. But whether your getting your paychecks from the state of Ohio or an employer, I think we all know that warm weather and summer feelings leads to an added insensitive to splurge on booze, recreational drugs and bbq supplies. So, I think people of all demographics can relate to this silky, cool jam and enjoy catching a buzz and catching some sun.
Kid Cudi - Cleveland Is The Reason
If you're going to be enjoying the best season of the year, you might as well enjoy it while listening to a song about the best city in the United States.
Delinquent Habits - Return Of The Tres
This is probably one of those songs you think you've never heard of until you start listening to it. That's probably because you can probably find it featured or sampled in any video game, tv show, or movie dealing with or taking place in Mexico. I've been a big fan of Delinquent Habits for a while now, and many of there songs would be honorable mentions on this list. The mariachi-like samples they use really just update a style of music that would go well with a cold beer on a patio somewhere anyways, so it's not really a surprise that many of their jams find their way onto my summer playlists.
Kanye West - Drive Slow
Drinking, partying, fun times. But even a drive down the street can be an adventure in the summer. This song makes any ride to work in June a little more tolerable. And it definitely makes you want to skip lunch so you can get out an hour early and catch some extra happy hour.
Lupe Fiasco - Daydreamin'
Because in the summer, out of all the things to do, sometimes the funnest thing to do is nothing.
Pitbull - Culo
Let's face it, the best part about more degrees is less clothing. Ted Alexandro points that out perfectly. But all the songs about ass out there, which to choose?
Before Pitbull was selling him rhymes to R&B artists 16 bars at a time or telling you what to drink (I do love Dr. Pepper, but prefer Miller Lite to Bud Lite), he was a renowned rhymesayer. But, as he does with most things, Lil Jon ruined that. But before it all went bad, this breakthrough single gave us another ass-anthem. I don't know, sometimes a different language classes things up a bit. Sure, while you were singing along you essentially shouted "ass" about 2 dozen times...but because you were actually screaming "culo," it seems a little more innocent an fun. Either way, enjoy summer, and like Ice Cube, make sure if you take a girl home to, "put that 'culo' to sleep."
St. Lunatics - Summer In The City
Good list so far Justin, but if you want us to replace "Summertime" on our summer playlists, at least give us one song with "Summer" in the title!
Point taken. This little diddy was always a favorite of mine. Now, all of the Lunatics, aside from Nelly, have varying degrees of competence as MC's (noted by their lack of success outside of projects with Nelly), but the beat, good feelings, and chorus (done by Nelly), keep the song firmly in place as a summer staple for me. Why's Bill Murray in the video? Apparently this song was on the soundtrack for the film "Osmosis Jones." Why did that movie have a soundtrack? Some questions have no good answers.
What are some of your favorites? Comment below and let me know!
Sumukh and Golak welcome Sean Somerville to this episode of Comedifans. The three talk Ohio State basketball, getting out of the house, the NCAA tournament, gambling, drinking, mascots, baseball, RG3, and pee delivery.
For as many years as I've loved baseball, I've never had the opportunity to see a spring training game. There's a simple reason for that. I've never lived in Florida or Arizona. But, on my recent vacation to Florida, I had the opportunity to go to Kissimmee to Osceola Heritage Park for my first ever spring training game.
Osceola Heritage Park is the spring training home of the Houston Astros. The Astros were facing off against the Atlanta Braves. You probably couldn't have grabbed two teams that I have less of a connection with, so my interest in the game was already high. I couldn't even name you a player on the Astros roster if asked before the game. But, it was beautiful day and baseball, so I was looking forward to it.
Spring training is impressive because this park is actually smaller than a minor league stadium, but you get to watch major league teams in action. Every person who works at the park was very nice, and even though the concessions are still overpriced, they are at a rate that seems appropriate for spring training. A $3 pop compared to a regular season, major league stadium price of over $5.
The game wasn't particularly exciting probably because I had no vested interest in either of the teams and recognized only three of the eighteen players in the starting line-up. Dan Uggla was one of the lucky three and he hit a home run to left field that got the Braves fans in the crowd excited.
The oddest moment came with the music selection by the DJ. Anytime that there was a break in the action, Skylar Grey's portion of “Coming Home” was played, which is the kind of song that could only potentially put you over the edge into sleep at a spring training game. I felt like there had to be a better song if they were going to play something whenever the catcher came to the mound. My immediate thought in my mind as to what song that should be?:
I guess it works. At least, I would have gotten a chuckle while the rest of the crowd got completely confused.
My brother and I left after the sixth inning. While it was a beautiful day to enjoy baseball, I think we were both nearly falling asleep watching back-up players for the Astros commit throwing errors.
As we headed out, I decided to use the bathroom. When I got out, my brother had a ball in his hand. He had caught a foul ball. By caught, it meant that it rolled towards him after bouncing off the memorabilia table he was looking at. Ahh, spring training. You're more likely to get knocked in the head by a ball while getting nachos than actually being in the ballpark. Not really interested in keeping a baseball, my brother and I looked for a kid we could give the ball to. There were none around. The only person that approached us was a guy who wanted a ticket stub to get back into the ballpark so he could buy his brother a baseball. My brother gave him the ticket stub, and wondered why he didn't just give him the baseball he caught. It would have been a wonderful gift from siblings to other siblings.
So, all in all, it was spring training. The action and experience was deserving of the C- baseball I expected. But, it was a beautiful day, and it's baseball, and there may be no better live sports experience than that.
Manchester United, one of the most prominent football clubs (soccer teams) in the English Premiere League, has been accused of running a Self-Bounty Program during the 2008, 2009, and 2010 seasons.
As part of the program, players were rewarded for taking dives, faking injuries, and incurring penalty kicks.
Michael Owen, a forward, recalls how some of the payouts went, "When it first started, it was $5,000 for a yellow card, $10,000 for a red card. I remember one game Wayne [Rooney] took a spill with a defender two feet away from him in the goal box. We got a penalty kick that put us ahead and we ended up winning the the game. Rooney has a beach home he goes to in the offseason now."
The Premiere League vows to look into the matter immediately and threatens the possibility of harsh penalties against Manchester.
When Man. U. Coach Sir Alex Ferguson was approached yesterday and asked for a comment, he stated, "I would love to tell you everything I know about the situation in great detail..." Before he could finish his statement, Ferguson clenched his chest and dropped to the floor. He was rushed to the hospital where he is reportedly in very good condition.
Sumukh is out of town this week, but Golak forges on with two hilarious, and former, guests, Dan Swartwout and Bill Arrundale. The trio discuss URLs, Ohio State basketball, Buford, the Big Ten Tournament, officiating, Frank, Rocky 3 and 4, the Bounty System, Hines Ward, WWE Films, and the Rhodes family's twitter accounts.
When I was a kid, the Indian grocery store was a place to go to for Indian people and their cuisine. It was also a place for other ethnicities to get goods that were similar to Indian cuisine. It was furthermore a place for very liberal white people who had experimented with Indian food to buy some things that they could cook at home.
As the years have past, Indian cuisine has expanded. There are now plenty of Indian restaurants and grocery stores, and Americans of all ethnic backgrounds have probably tried Indian food at least once, and have now ventured into cooking it themselves, which is fantastic.
However, though times may have developed and changed, the Indian grocery store has not. It is exactly as I remember it in the late 1980s.
When you walk into the Indian grocery store, you are greeted by tile floors. These tile floors have been there for decades. The cash register (singular – if there are multiple, you are likely in a Patel Brothers -- more on them soon) is to the right, and the owner is working behind it.
There are a few rows of shelves, and all of them contain what you need for Indian cooking from curry powders to mango pickle jars to fresh vegetables to a frozen section filled with microwaveable curries, parathas, and ice creams (by the way, I’m salivating at this point).
There’s always a spot for already cooked items such as samosas or desserts to-go like jalebis or gulab jamun. If you forgot all the things you needed for a religious holiday, this is where you directly head to.
Every Indian store has a video section, and in many cases, we haven’t moved beyond the VHS tape. Some Indian stores have rid themselves of that and have only DVDs. Don’t expect to find a Blu-Ray disc. This won’t happen until Blu-Ray players shoot down to $50 a pop. Likely, the Indian store’s rental policy is hilarious. It will be something like $1 a night or $5 for you to just go ahead and keep it. It’s because these movies are pirated anyway. In the past, I’ve rented a VHS tape that started off with a DVD menu. FBI policies don’t matter when it comes to Indian films in the grocery store! (for further information on FBI policies, please see my blog post below on the Ghostwriter episode).
In the growing world of social media, businesses have put themselves out on Twitter, Facebook, etc. I don’t know of one Indian grocery store that has done such a thing. To them, there is no need. Normally, in the area you live in, there’s one Indian store, and that’s your spot. “Why would we need to move on from the lifestyle of 1989?” the Indian store owner asks, and in a weird way, is probably right.
In my city of Columbus, the Indian store to go to is Patel Brothers. Patel Brothers is actually a chain of Indian grocery stores. Patel is the most common Indian last name, so it is pretty much equivalent to whatever other generic American last name you choose. In this case, it is Walton since Patel Brothers is probably the only and most popular Indian store chain. However, just as Wal-Mart gets its criticism, so does Patel Brothers apparently. A random Google search of Patel Brothers in Columbus brings up a number of reviews (possibly from the same person) about poor business practices that push out the independent Indian store owner. Have I looked into it further? No. This is my only Indian store in town. I have no choice. Until the government intervenes and puts laws into place that stop whatever may be going on, what can I possibly do? The government’s not even caring about the Indian movie issue.
The Google reviews also bring up another funny topic. Miss writes:
“Some of the customers here fill their carts, and then use them to "save" a place in line--going back out to the store to get more things to add. So a person with only five or six things may very well stand behind two or three completely loaded, unattended carts waiting their turn. I really wonder where some of these customers live---like maybe they are from out of town or something.”
Yes, Miss, they are from out of town. That town is called India! For someone else not familiar with the Indian store, this is a phenomenon that happens regularly. I haven’t experienced it while at Patel Brothers because it’s a much bigger store, but at your local Indian store, it totally happens. While it is unfair, for whatever reason, growing up and seeing it in the world of the Indian store, it was totally acceptable. Every Indian mom in the local Indian store was doing it, and somehow amidst the mass of various groceries for different individuals on the counter, there was order and sense to it all. I guess that happens when your nation has to deal with a billion people.
As you leave the Indian store, you will always see a bulletin board. The bulletin board features information on new Bollywood movies that will be coming out for one night at a random local movie theater, ads for festivities for certain Indian groups, and individuals advertising if you need their assistance. At my recent visit to the Indian store, there was a sign that read:
NEED A BABYSITTER? CONTACT SUMAN!
I assume that Suman is the female twin version of me who chooses to babysit rather than do stand-up comedy. But, this is again a part of the environment of the Indian store and community. Why potentially pay for some random teenager in the neighborhood to babysit your children when you have a perfectly reliable Indian person advertising to do that? You can potentially avoid all that ridiculous English speaking, their services will be cheaper, and they’ll probably be happy to accept the puri you have in your refrigerator as snack food while taking care of your kids.
So, that’s the Indian store for you. As far as I know, it’s somehow still been the same for years and works in its own world where its rules are perfectly acceptable. The only change may be the music that may play in the Indian store. In my most recent visit, I heard some Hindi rap fusion song probably by the Wiz Khalifa of India. I can’t say I’m a fan, but it now gives at least a little bit of the American influence to the world of the Indian store.
I lifted weights at a gym today. On the second floor of the gym were treadmills. Whoever was on one of the treadmills was watching a TV, which was the only sound that was carrying throughout the entire gym. I have no idea what was on the TV, but all of a sudden, it started playing a snippet of The Weather Girls’s “It’s Raining Men.” I almost injured myself on the lat pulldown from laughing. There’s something funny about “It’s Raining Men” playing at a gym. Then again, there just might be something hilarious in general about “It’s Raining Men,” and my memory of the song.
Let’s start off with the group itself. The Weather Girls (Izora Armstead and Martha Wash) were originally known as Two Tons O’ Fun, which is probably the most inappropriate name a record label could have given them short of getting race involved in the matter. The phrase “tons of fun” would later return to some hilarity when used by the character of Jack Cole in Sideways.
After a few successful dance hits, Two Tons O’ Fun released “It’s Raining Men” under the name, The Weather Girls, and it became their biggest success. From that point on, they were The Weather Girls, though I have a feeling that connecting their group name to their most famous song only made the potential for typecasting that much higher. I’m still confused as to why their follow-up song was not “The Blizzard of Hermaphrodites.”
The song and group drew popularity in the gay male community, which spread of course in how we interacted with it as teenagers. I remember a guy in high school saying, “It’s raining men” for some reason, and then another guy responding, “Are you sure you want to say that?” as if to imply now that he was gay for saying, “It’s raining men” or admitting that he liked the song. Ridiculous. Needless to say, the guy didn’t know how to respond back without worry that his heterosexuality would come into question. I guess I automatically think of that occurrence with the song because of how silly a situation it was. If you like “It’s Raining Men,” you like “It’s Raining Men.” It’s fun to dance to! Then again, I wasn’t about to put my foot down in a conversation I wasn’t even involved in. I was a teenager! I was awkward and lacking confidence on anything, particularly early 80s dance hits (trust me, I wouldn’t have even stood up for Rick Springfield’s “Jessie’s Girl” at the time, and we can all say that song is awesome).
The most hilarious thing in regards to “It’s Raining Men” is its video. Enjoy the song again, and its visuals:
One Ton O’Fun Izora’s role as Mother Nature is pretty amusing. But, probably the funniest part is the random half naked dudes that come out of nowhere. Half naked dudes are now common in pop music videos. But, at the time, they were rare and that could possibly explain why most of them aren’t really in that great of shape. I like that I could have been cast in this music video. Speaking of which, how odd of a resume inclusion is that? “I’m an actor. You may remember me as the most thin and not really in shape guy in the ‘It’s Raining Men’ video. So, I think I’m perfectly qualified to play the love interest opposite Madonna in ‘Like a Prayer.’” Also, cue 3:24 in the video. If you look at the lower left corner on the mash of men surrounding Martha, you’ll see a man who could potentially be Sherman Hemsley’s evil twin.
My amusement with “It’s Raining Men” probably continues because it’s always been used in funny ways (Bridget Jones’s Diary comes to mind…the guy from high school is now really questioning my heterosexuality for referencing that in an “It’s Raining Men” post.)
To add to my odd connection to The Weather Girls, I remember watching a VH-1 show that contained information on the group, and Martha Wash discussing her lawsuit against C+C Music Factory for not providing proper credit and compensation for her vocal work on “Gonna Make You Sweat (Everybody Dance Now).” She was successful in her suit, received proper credit, and ultimately a record deal. Though, to the general public, in a match-up between The Weather Girls and C+C Music Factory, it’s possible that no one wins.
Sadly, Izora Armstead passed away in 2004. Martha Wash continues to sing. The Weather Girls still perform, but are now composed of the two daughters of Izora. Thomas Haden Church earned an Academy Award nomination for his role as Jack Cole in Sideways. The whereabouts of all half naked dudes in the “It’s Raining Men” video are unknown.
