Comedy And Music

I love comedy. I like music. I sometimes make fun of music and musicians, but it's purely in a comical way. I don't have any actual ill feelings towards music or musicians. I listen to music and truly enjoy it, and I have a good amount of musician friends who, almost unanimously, are fun, nice, hard working people. Any faux or hyperbolic dislike I put forth towards music and musicians is truly for comical purposes and really just stems from a "red-headed stepchild" feeling I get as a comic when compared to other artists--particularly musicians.

Recently I was at a show that...well wasn't the best show I've ever done. "Ambush" comedy at its finest (worst). "Ambush" meaning that it was a room full of people that thought they were at a bar and grill to have some food, some drinks, and maybe some good times with their friends, but wait, I'm actually here to tell you jokes! I know you want to have a conversation with someone you've known for years, but I'd prefer you to have a conversation with me, a slightly drunk stranger, for about 20 minutes. Oh yeah, and just so you know, I'll be the only one talking during this conversation, and if you try to talk during it, I'll get angry and possibly make fun of your most obvious physical flaw. Now I'm not condoning heckling. If at any normally run and put together comedy show you decide to forcefully interject yourself into the proceedings, you should be removed from the show. And possibly executed. In public. As a warning to others. But I digress. However, in this extreme situation, I sympathize with the show patrons. Especially when the show was apparently an "Ambush" to the manager of the bar and grill as well. Pro tip: A venue not knowing they are hosting a show on show date is bad. Now, while I didn't really need to talk for 20 minutes to a group of people who not only couldn't care less I was performing but who I sympathized with not caring that I was performing, I also needed the $20 I was getting paid. I figured, "Hey, just go out there and get through this. It's probably going to suck, but it will be over soon. Maybe if you have some fun with it, you might actually have a good time. Either way, eye on the cash and then we can go home." I was happy for a second and then I questioned my life choices when I realized that's probably the mentality of every hooker across the country with a strange dick in their mouth right now. Sooo...to tie back to the original point, which seems like a light-year of words away at this point, there was also a guy playing cover songs on an acoustic guitar in the same bar and grill in a different section. I joked with the crowd, "If anyone is enjoying the show, thank you, you are cool people. If anyone saw the guy downstairs playing cover songs on his acoustic guitar and made the conscious choice to leave and come upstairs to watch comedy instead, you are the coolest people ever! See here's the thing. If you're a comic, you spend years honing your act, finding your voice, writing tons and tons of unique, honest, and heartfelt material--most of it shitty--just to distill it down to a half hour--or eventually an hour--of sharp, funny jokes. And after years of honing and perfecting, if you're lucky enough and market yourself well, you may get to tell jokes in a bar to a bunch of people who don't give a fuck. But if you're a musician. And you learn a few covers. You'll get your dick sucked A LOT."

But again, just jokes. And while I like musicians being musicians and comics being comics, I do like the rare and beautiful instances where we can all come together. I did describe my feelings as that of being a "red-headed stepchild" in the arts community, and while it's not a stellar feeling, the wording does carry with it the connotation that we are, as artists, a family. Awww. My favorite examples of the mash-up?

Zach Galifianakis does a great chunk in his shows where he spouts clever one-liners while perched in front of a piano. While the one-liners could probably stand alone, the piano accompaniment gives it a certain well paced timing that I think accentuates the funny.

Bill Hicks used music in his CD "Rant in E-Minor" in a more subtle, but still enjoyable way. The CD is around an hour of fairly ordinary (and I mean that in the style of the CD as a comedy album not in Bill's material which is astronomically above ordinary) stand-up comedy. However, the ends to some of the jokes are highlighted by melodic riffings and music is used throughout as kind a post-production segways from point to point. It's subtle but interesting. It fits well and doesn't distract from the powerful comedic material that Hicks puts forward. When something is so subtle and downplayed, it can be nice, however it then begs the question after listening to it, "was it necessary." While not a huge component of a great comedy album, the music really adds something--even if it's slight--to the overall composition. (I'll post one of my favorite examples below, but feel free to check out the full album HERE if you have the time. Yay, internet!)

However, I think the best use of music with comedy comes from the great Doug Stanhope. On Stanhope's album "Something To Take The Edge Off," Doug does a full length set with a guitar accompaniment the entire time. There are a few reasons this rises above the previous examples for me. First, it's during his whole set. While I think Galifianakis' piano chunk is great, it's still a part of his act. Other comics, like Demetri Martin, have similar chunks with pianos and other instruments. They are funny (at least in the two examples of Zach and Demetri), but it's still a specific gimmick for that particular part of the show. Stanhope essentially put his entire act to music. Crazy! And in this case, very good. Also, Galifianakis, Martin, and even Hicks were/are musicians. They play the music used in their acts. Doug Stanhope had a live guitar player on stage the entire time playing along to his musings. To me, this is what's great about it. Not just music and comedy, but two guys together playing and feeding off each other and putting on a great show. It's not just a comedy and music mash-up, but a synergy similar to watching a full band performance. And if you get the chance to listen to the full album, which is great, you will see that the two performers work together great. The music fades, almost indistinguishably, to the background during the set-up and crescendos as the punchline hits. The melodic sound of the music stays relatively constant throughout the performance, but the guitar player does well to occasionally change the tone of his tune as the material sees fit. I don't know the full history of the pair up, but even if unpracticed, I have to imagine the guitarist was at least familiar with Stanhope's act. If not, hey, even more impressive. A truly great comedy album. Inventive for sure, but with no lack of just truly hilarious bits from a truly hilarious comic.

I so enjoyed this album when I first heard it, it made me want to embark on a similar comedic expedition. So, music friends, what do you think? I'll do time, you play music? We'll practice a little, rock the show, I'll get drunk, go home, pass out--and you can go get your dick sucked. Art!

Comedifans - Episode 028

Sumukh and Golak get together to talk NHL playoffs, more gambling, a new favorite NHL team, bullying, the movie Powder, Indians, perfect games, cycles, playing hard, and a weight training tease for next week.

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Justin Golak's Debut Comedy Album "Influenced" Released

Justin Golak's debut comedy album "Influenced" releases today! Only $5 and available for digital download at justingolak.bandcamp.com. Get your "COMEDY" t-shirt, like the one featured on the album cover at the bandcamp site too!

ME-TV: For 8 Year Old ME!

As referenced in “Comedifans”episode 27 (yes, I keep self-referencing “Comedifans” episodes in blog posts for whatever reason), I bought a new TV. It's a big deal for me because I just don't buy anything. I never care to upgrade at anything unless it is needed. But, I finally got fed up with looking at a tube television in my living room, and decided to go all out and be a man. I purchased a 42” VIZIO HD television, which is the perfect size for my apartment without the television being too overpowering for the space in the apartment.

While I may have purchased a HD TV, I've found I'm still living in a world of television watching that doesn't involve HD. One of my biggest faults as a comedian has been that I just don't keep up with what is going on in comedy on television (or in drama for that matter). There are just too many shows on now between the major networks, cable, and the Internet, and I can't handle what I should be watching, so I end up watching next to nothing. I don't have cable, so I'm pretty much bound to what is on the major network channels or making the effort to actually watch shows on all networks on the Internet.

Even with access to the major networks, this past Thursday, I somehow managed to be my usual self. With a line-up of Community, 30 Rock, The Office, and Parks and Recreation, which are all shows I know to be funny and would want to watch or I haven't seen and have been encouraged to watch, I stumbled upon ME-TV, a channel that I was not getting on my antenna with my old TV and got sucked in.

ME-TV is a network that shows only classic television shows. On a Thursday night, I got sucked into The Bob Newhart Show, The Odd Couple, and Cheers. Watching The Bob Newhart Show is always a pleasure to me. Newhart is a legend that I always love watching, and I could be so lucky to marry a Suzanne Pleshette-type woman in the future. I haven't watched The Odd Couple in a long time likely not since it was a staple of the Nick-at-Nite line-up. It's still just as brilliant and hilarious as I remember it to be. And, Cheers, well it's Cheers. You can't not watch Cheers. Along with Seinfeld and the early seasons of The Simpsons, it is the best comedic writing in American television. So, NBC's great line-up stepped aside. I was going to have a nostalgia night.

What makes ME-TV the best television network out now is that it completely reminds me of being a kid watching these shows. Their commercial breaks are composed only of ads for other shows on ME-TV and for Colonial Penn Life Insurance. That's exactly the way it was growing up. There were always tons of Colonial Penn Life Insurance commercials with Ed McMahon (who no longer has life...sad).

I learned the word “compensated” from these commercials. Ed McMahon has now been replaced by Alex Trebek. It didn't make much sense to me, but then I realized that these commercials are targeted to people aged 50-85, which are probably the only people other than me that watch ME-TV. After hours of watching ME-TV, I even wanted to get life insurance and also was fearful of what's going to happen when I become a senior citizen. I also determined that since Colonial Penn does not care about your health history, every responsible comedian whose made suspect health decisions at this age but manages to hit 50 should get Colonial Penn.

So, despite the new television, I'm still living in my own world of being a kid again. I'm watching ME-TV, hockey games on NBC, and popping in my old classic show DVDs like The Adventures of Pete and Pete and Saved by the Bell. Hey, at least I'm enjoying what I like on a sweet TV.

Comedifans - Episode 027

Sumukh and Golak talk NHL playoffs, freezer farts, TVs, Miller 64, being a Young Professional, gambling, and Mike Tyson in Vegas.

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Nickelback : The Ultimate Heel Turn

Tonight, Nickelback hits the Value City Arena in Columbus. In my life, I am not sure if there has ever been a band that has been hated on so much for their music yet still had strong mainstream popularity (only Milli Vanilli comes close, but that was due to their lip-synching controversy).

In Comedifans' episode 26, a Chad Kroeger impression by Golak led to he and I talking about the subject of Nickelback. While both agreeing that Nickelback had become the butt of too many jokes and “hack” in comedy, I suggested that they had become so hated that it was time for something completely different to happen that would get a majority of people to be fans of them.

In the podcast, I couldn't quite pinpoint how that would happen, but I reflected on it, and I know what would be best for Nickelback: a heel turn.

In pro wrestling, a heel turn in simple terms is when a good guy goes bad. He does an action that ultimately turns him to the dark side and makes crowds hate him. Yet, there are heels that are very appealing, and ultimately get respected for pulling off the bad guy so effectively. Right now is the perfect time for Nickelback to do that.

But, how did we get to this point? For years, Nickelback has been producing popular songs. For many of their haters, the main problem is that the songs all sound the same, have little to no merit lyrically, and that the band is put under the label of rock. (Fact: we're just eight years away from Nickelback's eligibility in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame!) In a time period where the divide between independent and mainstream music is huge and opinions strong, Nickelback turned into the poster child for all that is wrong in what is labeled as rock.

In 2005, Nickelback got hit with criticism about their song similarity. If you read the article and listen to the “All Things Considered” report, there are a number of interesting points to this issue as a whole. First, there's the belief by a fan of music that this type of self-plagiarism is a duping of the band's fan base. Second, there's Nickelback's defense from Mike Kroeger that they have a “distinct style” and such a style can lead to similarity. Third, there's the defense from a forensic musicologist (I learned this existed in this article) that there is a difference in the songs and such similarities in music do not matter because it sounds good to the public. Fourth, there's Mikey Smith's response that his girlfriend now hates Nickelback as a result of his findings. So, Nickelback symbolizes the homogeneity of pop and mainstream rock music and goes against the demand of certain music fans for a more unique and consistently different creative approach from an artist. It's the constant battle that occurs in any art form of what is popular versus what is artistic. But, as I'll present, a heel turn could suddenly break up this criticism of homogeneity for Nickelback.

For years, Nickelback has taken a beating from rock music fans who do not see them as having a “distinct style.” As mentioned on Comedifans, it reached such a point that when they were chosen to be the halftime entertainment at the Thanksgiving game in Detroit, an online petition generated thousands of signatures. Nickelback eventually performed at the event to not much of a response from the fans at Ford Field.

In early 2012, Nickelback finally made a move to deal with the haters. They responded on Twitter to many tweets directed to them.

It was well done, but to me, it now needs to go further.

I'll now present my argument for a heel turn using Nickelback's own work. In 2003, they released the song, “Someday.” Listen closer to the lyrics. Nickelback forecasted their own heel turn potential for nine years later!

How the hell'd we wind up like this? / Why weren't we able to see the signs that we miss? / Try to turn the tables.

Nickelback can't conceive of how they ended up in this state: loved or hated. It is time for them to turn the tables and become true heels.

Someday, somehow, gonna make it all right, but not right now. I know you're wondering when.

No need to wonder when anymore. When is now.

Now the story's played out like this / Just like a paperback novel / Let's re-write an ending that fits / Instead of a Hollywood horror

Nickelback realizes they are the horror. The ending of the paperback novel is clear: heel turn!

Now, how do we implement Nickelback's heel turn? Well, first of all, Nickelback has to be completely prepared for nothing to matter anymore. They cannot care about their popularity or money. It's all about Nickelback and being whatever they want to be. If people want to come along with them, they can. If not, who cares? The responses to tweets began a thought process along those lines.

Nickelback needs to then go out and do a performance at a very public event and make the turn. I would say Saturday Night Live would be the best choice where there have been plenty of memorable live insane moments. In the middle of their song, the band stops, and Chad Kroeger lashes out against mainstream radio, their haters, and just everybody in general. He stands up for what Nickelback is. There is likely some profanity used, too.

After the shocking moment on Saturday Night Live, Nickelback grants interviews with morning shows and cable news networks. They continue to ridicule everyone even their own fan base with a “love us or leave us” attitude.

They continue their rampage on social media with more direct tweets to anyone and everyone.

The real risk for Nickelback is where it heads. They could go from being the band that fills arenas to being back to doing bar shows in no time. But, I think that's highly unlikely. If you go to enough YouTube videos for Nickelback (and I did for this post), you can see how divided the posters are and that even the lovers of Nickelback subtly would embrace a heel turn. They write that haters can “click the close button on their screen” or don't have to interact with Nickelback at all.

I genuinely believe that if Nickelback turns heel and shows that they wholeheartedly don't give a damn about anyone's opinion of them, their fan base will love them even more for having the guts to do it, and they'll win over the people who are indifferent to their music but will respect the approach.

It also would be one of the more captivating moments in music of the 2000s so far, and something that just hasn't happened in a form other than pro wrestling. The closest moment came in sports with LeBron James's “The Decision.” But, at the time, James had no idea he was doing a heel turn. He then attempted to embrace the villain role, but did it poorly because he never wanted to be the villain to begin with. If Nickelback wants it, they could grab it, and make music history.

I'm waiting on the heel turn. I can feel it coming. Then, and only then, Nickelback will become the greatest band in the world. I don't want them to end up having to feel like they had no time to rewind. Heels have no regrets.

Nailed It: A Comedian's Take On Celebrity

I often find myself quoting comedians during discussions about various topics. And with this being the era of YouTube, I'm not limited to just a comic's material, but to a plethora of interviews, radio and TV appearances, and the like to draw my reference. Comedy has always been my selected area of nerdom, and inserting myself into that world for the last 6 years has only heightened that obsession. However, I truly do believe, even if they are not overt social commentators like your Bill Hicks' and George Carlin's, comedians have a great voice on many of the issues that come up in society. I don't think they are smarter, wiser, or more well read than your average person. I just think they are probably the most honest people with a mainstream voice. And in a world where the media and the populace is seemingly teeming with bullshit at any given time, an honest voice is an extremely refreshing voice. And it's an honesty that comes from the unique ability to not give a fuck. Not giving a fuck is honesty in its purest, rawest form. It's an honesty in one's self. See, Larry King and Piers Morgan and all your other relatively centrist opinion givers have a burden. You have to like them. You have to be not too disturbed by how they look or what they say to keep them on the air, so you're never going to hear anything too far from the societal line. It's supposed to be their opinion, but it's mostly bullshit. It's mostly just AN opinion coming out of their face. Even more extreme commentators like Bill O'Reilly and Rachel Maddow fall into this group. It would seem, because they have a more "extreme" view, that they would be more apt to have an honest viewpoint with said view. But it's not. It's just differently framed bullshit. Their still towing a societal line with their opinions. It's just a line on the right or a line on the left. And while that obviously keeps them liked and on the air by the people that agree with them, it also keeps them on the air by the people that disagree with them. People that hate Bill O'Reilly hate him in the same way you hate your rival sport team. I'm an Ohio State fan. I hate Michigan. But do I really hate Michigan or do I LOVE going to games and screaming how much I hate them at the top of my lungs? The hate that people have for O'Reilly and Maddow is really a closer relative to fandom than it is to actual, visceral disdain. Comics don't have that burden. You don't have to like a comic, agree with a comic, or anything else like that. You have to laugh at a comic--be entertained by them. That's their burden. And it's a burden that is very open and allows for more truth that your average commentator is given.

And while my nerdom may draw me to quoting comedians more frequently than others, it's not purely based in that. For the reasons I've stated above, I generally do believe that many comics hold many fresh, interesting, and honest views that are worthy of being brought into various discussions. And I think bringing in the quotes and views of people you respect, both as commentators and people knowledgeable on the subject, is important to discussion. Your views are obviously, at least partially, formed by outside forces and voices. Why hide it? Or why muddle something that is well put just to garble it into your own voice? I quote Danny from "American History X" who said, quoting his brother Derek, which is truly fitting, "Someone else has already said it best. So if you can't top it, steal from them and go out strong."

With that being said, I would like to create a post where I take a topic, wax on it briefly and then present the views of one or multiple comics who I think really nail the point and present and interesting view on the subject. I would maybe like to make this a recurring post theme in relation to other topics, but we'll see how that goes.

For now, I'd like to talk about "Celebrity." Not celebrities or anyone specific per se. Just the idea of "Celebrity."

A couple days ago, thanks to a lack of cable and a lack of being needed outside my house in the afternoon hours, I watched "Anderson," the new talk show hosted by Anderson Cooper. On the particular episode I watched, he had two women on who are part of a small, but dedicated, group of people who make and/or collect "Reborn" dolls. Reborn dolls are dolls that are meticulously crafted to look and feel like actual, human babies. Not creepy enough for you? Well, one of the 2 women actually takes her doll out in public, in a stroller when out in public running errands. She also straps the doll into a car seat and puts it to bed in a crib. The other woman. Well, she has a YouTube channel where you can actually see her, among other things, feed and change her dolls. But the most surprising part about this episode of "Anderson." In the whole 20 or so minutes these women are on the air, not once does anyone, including Cooper, ever point on that these women are clearly mentally ill. If you have the world's largest collection of Coca-Cola merchandise, you're probably an eccentric collector. A quirky fellow full of more whimsy than your average person. Go ahead, have your 5 minute segment on the local news. If you own dolls that are purposefully meant to mimic and actual human child and then you go out of your way to painstakingly treat it as such, you need serious and immediate psychological help. The only redeeming thing I took away from this segment is that this obsession has most likely somewhat, if not completely, curbed these people's need to actually poison the world with their real offspring. Not that I take pleasure in bashing on a hypothetical, naturally innocent newborn. But let's face it, whether you believe a person is more shaped by nature or nurture, that child would be getting shaped in a super fucked up way on both ends.

So, why are they on TV? They're being exploited. Anderson Cooper isn't not pointing out the fact that these people are clearly disturbed because he doesn't see that or doesn't think they are. He's not pointing it out because to point it out would blow the cover. The jig would be up. You can't bring actual, clinical crazy people onto a stage, paint them truthfully as such and then mock and laugh at them. That'd be perceived as cruel and inhumane. But you can bring them on as "interesting hobbyists" and then feel free to chuckle at them in between ads for Frosted Flakes. Doug Stanhope sums this up best in a segment he does for a BBC news show where he talks about unwanted celebrities and talk show hosts. He uses Oprah as the example, but it's clear that in can be applied to any talk show, including Cooper's.

Finally, the other disturbing thing about this particular show is that these women got two segments. At the top of the show. Who got one segment? Right before sign-off? Edie Falco. An extremely talented actress who has been honing her craft for years and was part of arguably one of the best shows in TV history got the bump spot. Fuck cussing. Fuck sexuality. Or violence. Or any other arbitrarily morally ambiguous themes that entertainment is proposed to be presenting. I find this truly offensive. This episode of "Anderson" should definitely be rated TV-MA. Because only a mature audience, that is wise and jaded enough to know the world is not, and will never be, fair or just or right, should be allowed to be subjected to such a disturbing display of booking. Adam Carolla and Patton Oswalt speak on this phenomenon in a way that is very applicable.

Well, that is all. I hope you enjoyed. [insert strong conclusion here]

Comedifans - Episode 026

Sumukh and Golak are back and the duo talks about Opening Day, the Indians, the AL Central, getting into the MLB playoffs, American Gladiators, The Masters, Bubba Watson, Tiger Woods, Perkins, Nickleback, and STDs.

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Feel the Sting!

I did a show last night at Stinger's Lounge & Grill in London, Ohio. The show is run by my good friend, comedian Matt Horn. London is his hometown. I had a lot of fun at the show.

It's always a coin flip when I do one of these shows. How much of an audience will be at the show? Will they care? Even if they do care, will they like my act? I've done shows in towns the size of London that were filled up and they won't laugh. So, it's always fun to have the anticipation for whether I will just be talking on a stage for a half hour or people will actually laugh and be entertained.

Stinger's is a good, local place with a bunch of Stinger's-related items behind the bar including stuffed animals and figurines. I asked fellow comedian Mike Kolar if he wanted to buy one of the figurines. Then, I realized it likely wasn't for sale. This isn't the Hard Rock Cafe. Nevertheless, Mike and I contemplated if we would accept our payment for the show in figurines.

When we arrived to Stinger's, there were two separate other events that would be going on. Bike Night was from 6-9 pm. Comedy Night is at 9 pm. Then, DJ Elmus is at 10:30 pm. What a Friday night at Stinger's! I was particularly excited because Bike Night is always my demographic. It appears no one really showed up for Bike Night. While some of the people already there looked like bikers, I saw no bikes around Stinger's.

We set up the tables and then the show began. While the crowd was small, it was mighty. By mighty, I mean that I turned to Mike and said, “This feels like we're going to be doing comedy on a bus.” That's because each person in the crowd looked weird for completely different reasons. Matt Horn had a good thing going with a drunk man in the front named Craig. He then didn't have a good thing going with a drunk woman to the left, who apparently was so offended by a Cleveland Browns joke, that she left. There was then a racially ambiguous man in the back corner of the room.

Horn did a fine job as did Jake Tyler and Mike. I then went up on stage, and opened by saying, “We are only 25 minutes away from DJ Elmus!” which was an exciting fact. While Jake and Mike had taken a lot of time to talk to inebriated Craig, I was more curious about the racially ambiguous man. While he appeared weird at the beginning, he turned out to be a really nice guy named Miguel. He was not ambiguous. He was Puerto Rican. He enjoyed what I had to say and so did Craig and the others in the crowd. It's all you can ask for in comedy: to have a fun time on stage and entertain a crowd.

Prior to the show, I had given an Over/Under on how many times I would say “Stinger Splash” at 2.5. It ended up being 4 times. As I was about to go into my final joke, I shouted “Stinger Splash!” then attempted to explain to Craig what that was. In order to give the full effect, I demonstrated the move on a speaker on the stage. Imagine a skinny Indian guy in a sweater and chinos doing this:

The post-show dynamics got even better. Some bald guy with a beard and earrings (remnants of Biker Night?) came up to me and said, “Hey, are you at the Funny Bone?” I said, “Yeah.” He said, “Yeah. What's the sandwich? Onion sandwich!” I said, “Yeah,” and laughed, then cried on the inside knowing that if I died today, that would be my legacy. Hilariously, this guy watched none of the show, yet was the most talkative person to me post-show.

Once the show ended, DJ Elmus hit the tunes! The Lynyrd Skynyrd and Usher were flowing! Some woman was dancing around a pole by herself. Later, this woman felt the need to approach me and stroke my beard without saying a single word to me. Stinger's!

Well, it was time to go. It was another fun night of comedy. Above the bar at Stinger's, it has a sign that says, “I LOVE THIS BAR.” I totally agree. STINGER SPLASH!

Comedifans - Episode 025

A big show for a big weekend. Sumukh and Golak welcome Travis Irvine to the show. The three discuss the Buckeye's basketball game and Travis gives some in depth insight into the Crew. They also discuss Park Street, sponsorship, and getting older. Then Sumukh and Golak conclude the show with their Wrestlemania wrap-up. They talk matches, Cleveland celebrities, and Channel One News.

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